Well, things sure have been getting choppy
here in Exotic-land lately.
It all started when our General Manager,
Bryan Bybee, fired our former Editor
Gary Aker. All I could say was:
"It is beyond my control."
Then our new Editor, Jim Goad,
in quick succession, dumped Darklady;
ridiculed Goddess Severina; and
pissed off all the below-average-IQ, politically-correct,
hypocritic lesbians and Bob
Marley fans in the greater metropolitan
area (apparently there are a lot of them).
"It is beyond my control."
Then our ne'er-do-well salesman/photographer/employee-of-the-month
John "Spooky" Voge wrote a bunch
of nonsensical drivel castigating several
white trash strip clubs we don't like,
thus pissing off said white trash strip
club owners.
"It's beyond my control."
I was accused of satanic worship
by some washed-up, meth-addicted wannabe
rock star, and some washed-up, delusional
wannabe publisher.
"It's BEYOND my control."
I lost my rental privileges at Fantasy
Adult Video due to unpaid late fees.
"It is most certainly BEYOND my control."
But all is not lost. For instance, last
week, during a simple conversation with
a beautiful girl I had just met, I was
able to use the terms "Heisenberg Uncertainty
Principle" and "jerk off" in
the same sentence--legitimately--and she
was so impressed she french-kissed me
for nearly three minutes...
THAT'S
ME IN THE CORNER...
So now Exotic is getting
some of that old-time religion...
But with Osama bin Laden's Islamic
Jihad terrorism, Palestinian Muslim
suicide bombers, Rev. Billy Graham's
anti-Semitic remarks caught on tape, Catholic
priests paying over $1 billion in
hush money to cover up child molestations,
shunned Jehovah's Witnesses killing
their families, and Hindus mobbing
Muslims in India for killing a cow...
Hell,
Satan is starting to sound better
every day.
