by
Frank Faillace' [fuh-lah-chay]
Email: ffaillace@webtv.net
Office: 503-241-4317
"Before
me nothing but eternal things were made, and I endure eternally.
Abandon every hope, who enter here."
--The
Divine Comedy
Last
month, in between watching girls fisting each other in some
German pornos and searching out more and better ways to
light fires in small rooms, I celebrated my birthday in
a dark red roomful of haze from illegal green flowers grown
in Oregon, drinking illegal green liquor fermented in Czechoslovakia,
and consuming pepperoni pizzas, martini glasses, chocolate
cake and legal-by-prescription little blue vali-yum-yum-yums
from the local pharmacy.
"When
I had journeyed half of our life's way, I found myself within
a shadowed forest, for I had lost the path that does not
stray."
--The Divine Comedy
I
remember dark music, red lights, poker games, drunken lawyers,
locked bathroom doors, evil laughter, fires and lots and
lots of female flesh. I think someone may have pictures,
and thus evidence of that carnalicious late-night sinferno.
The person must be found and the evidence destroyed. We're
not fuckin' around here.
"There
dreadful Minos stands, gnashing his teeth: and he, the connoisseur
of sin, can tell the depth in Hell appropriate to it; as
many times as Minos wraps his tail around himself, that
marks the sinner's level."
--The
Divine Comedy
My
birthday was also the night of the Miss Nude Oregon Pageant.
From what I've heard my birthday was waaaay more fun, but
then that's not a big surprise. The fact it was fun had
nothing at all to do with my birthday. Over the years I've
learned the importance of being earnest and the insignificance
of being frank, if you know what I mean. Good times correlate
with good friends and good people, everything the pageant
lacked.
"My guide
and I came on that hidden road to make our way back into
the bright world; we climbed until I saw, through a round
opening, some of those things of beauty Heaven bears. It
was from there that we emerged, to see-once more-the stars."
--The
Divine Comedy
I
gotta go, my C.O.D. package from Germany just got here...
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