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"Can we, as a country, all
agree
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xmag.com
: November 2003: Sex
Toys
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Everybody
likes toys. Even though we've graduated from
 Fisher
Price and Mattel to Doc Johnson and California
Exotics, we still need to replenish our toy
boxes. It may seem like you've tried all the
vibrators and anal beads and tasted more lube
flavors than Baskin Robbins ice cream, but
there's always something new to put on your
wish list. And just like at Toys R Us, don't
forget the batteries!
Doc
Johnson's I-VIBE RABBIT leads
the pack, blending beauty and power just like
CEO Barbie. At the flick of a switch one can
change the speed of the vibration and/or mix
and match its functions. The control panel
is reminiscent of a digital stereo's equalizer
bars. As a girl's best friend this delectable
diddler, made of soft plastic similar to a
gummy bear, is sculpted well enough to look
and feel like an actual penis. Just below
the shaft is a window revealing pearls that
create delicious friction while the Rabbit
vibrates, multiplying the sexual sensation.
At the base of the shaft are lovely little
sculpted flowers.
* Vaginal
and anal stimulators vibrate
* Shaft
rotates front to back or side to side
* Available
in blue, green, orange, red and aqua
* Quiet
enough for the back aisles of a library
Pipedream
Products' MINI-MITE is a different
kind of vibrator, which you'll affectionately
name your Portable Pleaser. Transportable as a
bag of jacks, this clit pleaser is small and slender
enough to fit in your favorite little black purse.
Five attachments fit easily atop the vibrating
device--the nipple enlarger, anal exciter, penis
arouser and clit stimulator.
* 4" long,
about 1" in diameter
* Available
in red, purple, green, orange and blue
Pipedream
Products' MICRO MASSAGER fits like
a tiny tampon in the hand and feels like a vibrating
tongue between your most sensitive crevices. Basically
it's a smaller, more aerodynamic version of the
Mini-Mite.
* 2" long,
1" in diameter
* Available
in pink or iridescent
* Quiet
enough for a busy restaurant
* 1.5 V
battery (included)
Moving behind
the scenes to anal beads, there are two words
of advice: material and retrieval. Find strands
with an end ring for easier insertion and retrieval.
Doc Johnson's may be the prime example. The smallest
bead plunges the deepest, and the largest bead
is one inch in diameter and is directly next to
the retrieval ring.
* A ring
at the retrieval end makes pleasure one delicious
pluck
Also try
the MICRO PLEASURIZER/VIBRATING ANAL  BEADS
by Pipedream Products. Barring overuse, this combo
will never become boring. It's a micro massager
and a flexible, detachable strand of silicone
anal beads.
Now let's
get a little kinky with something tantamount to
Twister: ben wa balls. The key to this toy is
movement. Kinetic movement, such as walking or
jumping, provides the stimulation needed internally
to reach peak pleasure. GOLD BALLS
by Golden Triangle are two gold vibrating balls,
conveniently linked by a string which allows for
handy retrieval. Doc Johnson makes strands with
two, three, or four balls, available in black,
red, blue and white latex. Swedish Erotica makes
a strand of five latex-coated beads connected
by a nylon string. Once again, the easy-retrieval
string cannot be overemphasized.
* Balls
are 1" in diameter
* Retail
prices range from $6 to $32
Feeling
artistic? Break out the Play Doh of sex toys:
the PLEASURE SWING by Whip Smart.
This swing's possibilities end when your imagination
does. With its inherent suspension abilities,
the swing allows couples to do things otherwise
cumbersome on furniture, floors, walls, and other
immobile objects. It lends flexibility to people
who aren't otherwise limber. One favorite activity
is bouncing vertically onto an insertable sex
toy suctioned to the floor beneath the swing.
* Secure
to a ceiling stud within clear distance of walls/doors
(installation equipment included)
* Two leopard-
print cushion-y seats
* Superb
for intercourse, oral sex and masturbation while
reclining, kneeling, sitting and swinging
* Stirrups
effortlessly support ankles horizontally and
vertically
* Back-
and butt-supports ensure comfort
* Supports
up to 400 pounds
Somewhere
between Mr. Potato Head and a Lego set, the  LIBERATOR
is a mix-and-match collection of furniture.
Washable blue velvet cloth covers foam wedges,
blocks and ramps. Place the smaller, pillow-like
wedge over the large wedge for deep penetration;
place the wedges atop the stage for incredible
back door action; use the cube atop the stage
for terrific all-fours action. All arrangements
revamp traditional positions and facilitate imaginative
positions.
* Pieces
come with position guides and discreet storage
covers
* Especially
helpful for larger people
* Eases
lovemaking for pregnant and older couples
* Wedge
retails for $65-80 (two sizes)
* Ramp
retails for $130-180 (five sizes)
* Stage
retails for $130-160 (three sizes)
* Cube
retails for $100 (one size)
* Buy multiple
pieces at discounted prices
Men
would do well to remember the old adage "don't
ask what you don't want to know." This is certainly
true when it comes to a new girlfriend's sex
toy use. When a man asks if we have a vibrator
or if we enjoy sex toys, what response does
he really want? The question is a double-edged
sword, guaranteed to intimidate and/or intrigue
with a single word.
"How
often do you use it?"
We typically
respond with a one-liner, refusing to elaborate.
We know the images running through his mind.
He's silent for a moment, a smile delicately
curling his mouth. Then his mood changes and
he looks away. A shadow, maybe doubt, crosses
his face.
"Would
you ever prefer your vibrator over me?"
"No,"
we say, adding humorously, "Unless you've been
a complete jackass, I do not privilege my vibrator
over you."
But what
is it about toys that we like, sometimes even
post coitus?
"If a
woman has a problem orgasming, her partner should
encourage using these things. Women aren't like
men--we can't always have an orgasm like that,"
says Heather Schmucker, who works in an adult
toy shop in Sarasota, Florida, snapping her
fingers. She offers another reason for a man
to support his girl's affinity for toys--beside
the obvious fact that they're fun for couples
to explore. "If your man's always traveling
I'd strongly encourage him to buy you something.
Having a sex toy keeps women less likely to
stray. See, we have needs, too, and if they
aren't being fulfilled, we can stray like a
man."
But
no, she says, a vibrator could never replace
a man. "It's not the embrace of a man, the
throb, the warmth of a man. Men don't need
to feel threatened."
Eve
Oak of Troy, Ohio, agrees. She could certainly
have used a toy to prevent infidelity when
her boyfriend moved to another country. "But
when we first started dating a few years before
that, he was really intimidated by my Purple
Friend and I got rid of it for him. Well,
I learned my lesson--and so did he--after
that." Now, she says, she doesn't have the
intercontinental love affair but she does
have a drawer full of toys.
Gary
Wilham of Chicago, who's been married for
about 20 years, enjoys buying toys for his
wife and using them with her. His suggestion
is somewhat unconventional for the field of
adult toys: sexy high heels. "Every woman
should have a pair of heels with no scuff
marks on the bottom," he says. "These shoes
should never leave the bedroom." His other
recommendation: glass dildos, such as the
beautiful, artistic, hand-blown toys by Phallix
(www.phallixglass.com).
Heather
suggests using strap-ons. "There's nothing
wrong with guys using a strap-on, (especially
if) he's not lasting long enough for her.
I recommend he get one close to his own size
though if he doesn't want to intimidate or
'overdo' her." (Check out some strap-ons at
www.safesexmall.com.)
And
don't forget: fresh, clean bananas and cucumbers
never go out of style. One word of advice
regarding cucumbers: smooth out the bumps
before devouring! Yum.
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